I have made videos and spoke about working in toxic environments and working in great environments. I have experience in many different fields since I've started working when I was still in high school. I've been the employee that slacks off, the one who works the hardest, the positive one, the negative one, etc. I've worked jobs that paid me way less than I'm worth and some that paid me more. Small employers who gave awesome bonuses and HUGE companies that don't even give a Christmas bonus.
My point is, I've been around. I never followed the outdated rule that you have to stay at a job at least a few years to avoid having too many jobs on your resume. I think that's bullshit. I've stayed at some jobs for 3+ years, others I left before I even hit the year mark. My moving from job to job has given me experience in a variety of fields.
EVEN IF YOU ARE WELL INTO YOUR CAREER, TRUST ME, THIS BLOG IS FOR YOU. AND IF YOU'RE AN ENTREPRENEUR OR SMALL BUSINESS OWNER OR ARTIST, THIS IS FOR YOU TOO READ TIL THE END.
Throughout each different job, one thing has remained the same. I am expendable. I am just a number. It really doesn't matter how great of a job you have, at the end of the day, you are replaceable. With this being the case, why do we work tirelessly day in and day out without using our PTO? Better yet, needing to request it and give detailed reasons why we need the time off. Hear me when I say this, even if you're a doctor, if you died tomorrow, they would find a replacement for you. Onto the next one.
Take time for yourself
I have watched jobs destroy people. I know people who have worked at the same company for over 20 years and get treated like shit. I met someone recently who has the same job for 30 years and they let him go randomly, without notice. That 60 year old man found himself searching for a new job after having put in 30 years at a company and just thrown away like he never mattered. In the conversation I had with him he said to me "dear, never let this job take over your life. They don't care about you at the end of the day. Take a vacation with your significant other.".
He's fucking right. Half the time when you are a hard worker in an environment full of lazy people, they just add more your desk instead of evening the work load by hiring more efficient employees. A lot of companies add more and more work to their best people without giving a raise and hardly even a genuine thank you. In the past 3 years since COVID many employers have been short staffed and you would think they would give raises to their employees working twice as hard, instead they continued to expect more from them with no extra compensation.
I've also had great bosses, I'm not saying they all suck. What I am saying is that they don't care about you at the end of the day. You need to make caring for yourself a fucking priority. Spend more time with your family, the people who DO care and love you. Spend time taking care of yourself. Take a mental health day and use that day to do small things that bring you so much joy. Do a date night with your lover at that new restaurant you've been dying to try. DO SOMETHING FOR YOURSELF.
Don't bring that negative energy home with you
Yesterday I had a hard fucking day at my job. I can't speak on specifics but I work in an environment where we are constantly short staffed because people call out often when other employees are using their SCHEDULED time off already. I won't get into the details of what happened but I've been doing so well with keeping a positive mental attitude because I know that I am in control of my happiness. Yesterday I hit my breaking point and instead of reacting on the whirlwind of emotions I was experiencing, I chose to do something to clear my head.
The best way I know how to clear my head is to workout. So, I headed home after my shift, put my gym clothes on, and did my 2nd workout of the day. Instantly, I changed my mood and my energy. I didn't want to bring that energy home so I worked it out in the gym. I ended my night feeling really good.
I woke up with the intention of doing things on my day off that bring me joy. I did my morning routine and then I picked something from my joy list, a slow cup of coffee. I haven't been drinking coffee for a month now but I knew it would bring me instant joy, so I had a small cup while reading a book which was exactly what I needed. I needed to slow down today and choose joy in small ways.
On those shitty days at work (let's be real we all have those days where everything goes wrong) spend some time in the bathroom just to regroup in the moment. Get through your work day and when you're finished quickly do something you love to ensure you don't bring that bad energy home with you. One thing Brian and I try our best to practice is to leave negative energy at work, when we walk in that front door we come in with fresh energy. We don't always get it right but setting that intention is so important because like I said that job doesn't give a fuck about you so do not allow it to negatively affect your home life.
I could have come home yesterday and overate bad foods (something I do when I'm stressed) and puts sweats on and felt sorry for myself. But I didn't because I wasn't going to let that place negatively impact my home environment and cause me to end my night on a bad note.
Maybe after a bad day you need to call out the next day for your mental health, use your fucking sick time. People pride themselves in never using their time and that is crazy to me because that just tells me you are prioritizing your work over everything else in life which is a for sure way to be a great employee but fall short in being the best wife/husband, friend, mother/father, etc.
It doesn't matter what you do for money...
You must always make sure you are doing what you need to do for you. I know my fellow creatives and entrepreneurs who are either currently working a day job to pay the bills or needed to in the past - you understand how this is even harder when you're working this job that you don't even want just to make ends meet. I feel you my friend, I do. I will be the first to tell you there's a world full of opportunities out there, despite what the media tells you.
If your job is getting in the way of your happiness it's time to reevaluate. I'm not saying go and quit your job, that's not smart without some type of plan in place. But I am telling you to go inward. What is causing the unhappiness? What is causing the negativity? Why are you allowing this negativity to have power over you? Is it possible to stay in this work environment and live a fulfilling life? If not, start looking for better opportunities and once you find one, go for it.
Fun fact: 80% of the jobs I've been hired at, I had ZERO experience in. I tell you this because I'm proof that you don't need to stay at a job that makes you miserable. Or if you are in a career that you love, maybe there's another company you could work for or a way to create change within the company you are at. Or if you're a small business owner, maybe it's time to hire an employee to take some weight off your shoulders. Or if you're an entrepreneur or creative who is dying to work on their passions full time, be willing to struggle financially maybe take less hours at your day job, get creative with 2nd streams of income, and go all in on your goals.
Where there's a will, there's a way
It's all up to you my friend. I know people who literally hate their jobs because their bosses are narcissists and they won't leave even after 5+ years of experiencing the manipulation and lack of respect. They won't leave because it's scary to take a leap, because society tells us it's irresponsible to move jobs or that there's a lack of opportunity.
You can find a way to put yourself in environments that are better for you. BUT first let me ask you this monumental question, WHAT IS IT IN YOU THAT IS ATTRACTING YOU TO THESE NEGATIVE ENVIRONMENTS? Do you not believe you're worthy of a job that you love or capable of pursuing your dreams? Are you experiencing imposter syndrome? Are you playing it safe? Are you afraid of disappointing people? These are all questions I've asked myself, open yourself up enough to find the TRUE answers.
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